Yes, my miserable 2005 is finally over and I'm slowing getting wasted on Moet & Chandon champagne alone in my home with my dog to keep me company and he's wondering what I am doing listening to Ian Curtis lyrics on my stereo and dancing around the family room in my underwear. The pellet stove is burning full blast and it's a toasty 86 in my house and why shouldn't I fucking dance around half naked when there's no one around to watch me?
I just toasted myself to a new year a dozen times and I have but two more glasses of champagne to finish from the bottle and I'm starting to feel like shit the first day of the year. But hell, I'm not driving around town and I am safely inside my house and what destruction can I do while drunk? Not much since I can type fairly coherently while intoxicated. And my family, whom I love so dearly, came over and helped me cut the old fence wood into small sections this afternoon so the garbage men can haul it all away in a week and a half. My family; they love me so much and are so supportive, I am so damn lucky.
But my friends, I don't know. Last night, I attended a New Year's eve party in the Mission district, whom my bipolar depression suffering friend invited me to. Only later did I realize that I was invited solely as her designated driver in case her meds brought on the usual "migraine, sensitive to light, upset stomach" after effects and she would need a ride home. Like clockwork, at 11:35pm, she wanted to go home. I've only been at this party for an hour and I'm enjoying myself and having a good time, forgetting what a shitty year I've had and she wants to fucking go home because the dim lights are giving her headaches. Lucky fucking me. So, I have to leave and apologize on her behalf because she is embarrassed to leave a party and say goodbye on her own and I have to drive her the fuck home and be on the damn road before midnight strikes. I hope she appreciates what I did for her especially after I handed her a late Christmas gift that I would have given her at my house party if she didn't leave soon after she arrived.
This must be the year of breaking up with friends and finding new ones since last year was breaking up with husband and boyfriend and NOT finding new ones. Fuck. I just finished the whole bottle of expensive champagne. I suppose the responsible thing to to do is drink water and pee it all out if I don't throw it all up.
It's all about SAFETY
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